Sunday, August 22, 2010

these raps are getting ridiculous

Sometimes when I rewatch myself on these rap videos, I have to walk out of the room and ask myself why in the heck I just exposed myself like that to all of the world. But then I remember that ya'll asked me to do it. So it's your fault. I can't help that I'm a giver.

Here's the breakdown of what I meant in my rap.

#1: Think about your chest
I may have mentioned it before (I never remember anymore), but keeping your chest up is extremely important in the lifts. If your torso comes forward at all, (which it actually will most of the time due to inflexibility, but still try to think about keeping it as tall and proud as possible) that generally will put your weight on your toes making it extremely hard to stand up with the barbell. A tall chest makes for a much more stable position whether it be in a front squat or an overhead squat.

#2: Think about your elbows
Elbows turn around the same time that the feet hit the ground. I don't mean turn them around in a T-Rex/reverse curl kind of way. I mean getting the elbows high and outside (which is happening as you pull yourself down. Read on, and this will make sense), and down and around REALLY fracking fast. The faster the elbows, the more comfortable you will feel receiving that barbell. Elbows can be EVERYTHING on a clean. Every time you have slow elbows on a clean, God kills a kitten.

#3: Think about Britney Spears
This is one of those common sense things that definitely doesn't need any explanation.

#4: Pull yourself under the bar
Do NOT jump and drop under that barbell. Jump up (getting as tall as possible (ATAP)) and when you cannot possibly get any taller, IMMEDIATELY change your hip direction from going up, to going down by physically pulling yourself down and around that barbell. If you try to jump and drop, that bar is going to beat you down EVERY SINGLE TIME (I dont know why I'm really into using caps lock right now) . However, if you pull yourself under the bar, you can guarantee that there will be no crashing of that bar on your chest and you will receive it in a much more comfortable position.

Which leads me into my last point...

#5: Become one with the barbell
If you pull yourself under the bar, you know where it is in space and you can avoid having that barbell come up really high and smack you right in the throat or nose or forehead (we've all had it happen). Not knowing where the barbell is means that you are not in control of it. That bar WANTS to be controlled. It wants you to meet it wherever it is (since when did a barbell start developing personality traits?). So just do it, ok? Be more zen-like with that barbell.


  1. Well said, er, rapped! Love it!

  2. Great stuff, Sage. Mahalo for EVERYTHING.

  3. Ah Snap - Sassy Sage has done it again!!!!
    Now i understand what you meant....

  4. Nice article
    I didn't realize you were so gangsta!

  5. This just made me really excited to oly lift this week.

  6. Very clever and informative - great job!!!

  7. I think that was the best rap I've ever heard! You are so fly and what's that word? Um.... white?

  8. I couldn't watch it. Really. It would ruin my image of you, Sagey. The starting picture is bad enough. I'll just imagine it's really not that bad and move on. Nursing a shoulder now, Sagey, but going to compete at the USAW event anyway.

  9. Love it!!! You have to come up to Seattle for a workshop!

  10. I have joked about becoming the bar- I will even say "I am the bar and the bar is I" in my mind- totally dorky, but this humour actually works for me. Can't wait to lift this week.

  11. Sage,

    Sorry I'm leaving a comment here, but I couldn't find an email address for you. I've been talking with your dad about some nutrition stuff, and he mentioned that you enjoyed our Whole9 nutrition workshop at CF Invictus. I just wanted to check in and see how your nutrition stuff was going, and to see if you had any questions after having a few weeks for our information to "settle in". You can email me at if you have any questions or comments. Thanks for your great posts on Oly stuff. Love it. Best,


  12. Sage,

    I just discovered your blog a couple weeks ago, and I am in love. But...I have had time to catch up on the whole thing and there hasn't been a single new post!

    A fan.

  13. Hey Sage,

    Nice post (and rap). I quoted you over on our Functional Fitness blog:

    Keep up the posts (and start scouting for a DJ to back you up!)